Live Coaching with Anna - June 4, 2025

Key Takeaways

• Anxiety often masks deeper issues; identifying the type of anxiety helps untangle it

• Trusting your instincts and forgiving yourself are crucial for healing after relationships end

• Anger is a natural part of grief; finding healthy ways to express it aids the healing process

• Focusing on personal growth and envisioning a positive future helps move past relationship challenges

Anxiety in Relationships

• Anxiety can stem from childhood wounds around not feeling good enough

• Identifying the type of anxiety (e.g. fear of unfamiliarity vs. genuine incompatibility) helps address it

• Practicing being present in the moment counteracts anxiety about the future

• Building trust in oneself is key to feeling more secure in relationships

Ending Long-Term Relationships

• Trusting instincts that a relationship isn't right, even if it's difficult to let go

• Forgiving oneself for angry outbursts during breakups

• Recognizing patterns of staying too long in unfulfilling relationships

• Focusing on personal growth and independence after a relationship ends

Processing Anger and Grief

• Anger is a natural part of grieving the end of a relationship

• Healthy ways to express anger: journaling, cursing, physical activity, talking with friends

• Understanding anger's purpose in signaling hurt and unmet needs

• Accepting the grieving process takes time; be patient with yourself

Rebuilding After a Breakup

• Focus on activities that bring joy and energy (e.g. fitness, time with friends)

• Envision and journal about a positive future for yourself

• Make small changes to your environment to facilitate a fresh start

• Draw on past experiences of overcoming challenges to build confidence

Personal Inquiry

• Practice identifying types of anxiety when they arise

• Find healthy outlets for processing anger and grief

• Focus on envisioning and working towards positive futures

• Leverage support from the group and other resources as needed

Resources

The "3 Ps" of learned helplessness, a framework developed by psychologist Martin Seligman, describe the negative cognitive distortions that contribute to a sense of helplessness. These are: Permanence, Pervasiveness, and Personalization